It's a beautiful day here in sunny Worthing and there are people walking past my office with lots of flesh on show. So, it's official, summer is on it's way and with that comes skiver-itis season, wrapped up with my friendly warning – your Boss isn't daft! He/ she will know if you are skiving off work, so don't do it!
Employers and managers have the experience to know that when the sun shines, their workers will “be up all night with a stomach bug” or “have a family emergency” when the truth is actually (mostly) that “The sun is shining and I can't be bothered to show up today.”
Sporting events are another one. During Wimbledon, employee absence rockets and when there's anything to do with football, “bugs” spread like wild fire.
Now, you may be genuinely sick, and that's ok. I am not advising that you go into work and spread your germs to all and sundry, but if you are poorly, make sure you follow my top tips below.
- Stay off Facebook! Nobody wants to hear about how awful you feel and your Boss might think that if you are well enough to take poor me selfies and upload them to your timeline, you are well enough to go to work
- Stay out of the sun! If you go into work the next day/ week looking bronzed or displaying tan lines, you are more than likely to feel the heat from a warning at work
- Stay at home. It's the international law of sod that if you pop to the shops or go for a chill out on the beach/ in the park, you will bump into someone from work
- Don't put on a weird “I must sound as sick as possible” voice when you telephone in your absence. You will sound ridiculous and unbelievable. Just speak normally
- Don't say “I'll be back in tomorrow” You don't know when you will feel better if you are genuinely ill. You didn't know in advance that you were going to be poorly, so you can't possibly know in advance when you will feel tip top again
- Lastly, if you suffer from Hayfever, be prepared! There is nothing more infuriating to an employer when someone takes time off due to an ailment they suffer from every year. Buy in the medication you normally take, wear wrap around sunglasses and try to avoid places that triggers an attack if you can. Worst case scenario, let your boss know that you suffer badly and ask if you can do tasks which aren't affected by your itchy eyes and runny nose temporarily until it passes, rather than taking a day off.
So, come on…tell me about your skiving off work activities. What's the best excuse you have ever given? Did you get caught skiving? Give me all the juicy gossip in the comments box below 😉